


because my heart and hers are the same

by thegreenfairy246



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:35:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23923183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreenfairy246/pseuds/thegreenfairy246
Summary: you're Bucky's best friend and he desperately wants you to be more.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader
Kudos: 50





	because my heart and hers are the same

Bucky had never been one for Tony’s parties. As Wanda had informed him, he was the textbook definition of a wallflower. Between the noise and all the people, he was usually ready to leave as soon as he got there. Until you came around. You were new to the tower. Something with computers, Bucky wasn't sure. Waking up stuck in a whole new world didn't do much for one's understanding of society's advancements. 

You looked like something Bucky shouldn't be allowed to touch, much less look at. You were all smiles when Tony had introduced you to him. Pure sweetness personified. Bucky had liked you since the moment he met you, but he was afraid. Before Hydra, Bucky was a ladies’ man through and through. After they were through with him, he could barely stutter out a few sentences. You tried hard to make it easy for him. You learned how he liked his coffee, his favorite cereals, and his affinity for fluffy blankets. If he didn't count Steve, you were as close a thing to a best friend that he had. He wasn’t sure if he could ever risk it by telling you he was in love with you. 

You can imagine his nerves when he saw you making your way over to him through the crowd. He strongly considered trying to hide, but he was fairly certain you had already seen him, so he steeled his nerves to face you. He could make it through one conversation. Probably.

“Barnes. C'mon. You've been holding that wall up all night. What’d ya have against dancing? I feel like I'm living in Footloose.”

Bucky chuckled, “Still haven't seen that movie.”

“It's on the list, Barnes, it's on the list. Have a little patience.”

“You know patience ain't my strong suit, doll.”

You laughed, “Do I ever. I also know you're changing the subject.”

“You noticed that?”

“Yes. C'mon Bucky, I'm sure you were a real Fred Astaire back in the day.”

“And you'd be overestimating me. I don't know, I guess dancing has just never been my thing.”

This was a shock to you. The infamously charming Bucky you had heard about in all Steve's stories didn't dance? 

“Well then. We'll just have to change that won't we?” You earned yourself a confused sound from Bucky, “Dance with me Bucky. Pleaseeee?”

Even if he had wanted to, he couldn't have said no to that pout.

Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Bucky was wide awake. Between his nightmares and the weather's sudden drop into winter, he couldn't fall asleep. It's stupid really, Bucky realizes that. It's obvious to him it's got nothing to do with HYDRA. He's got no chance of being put back in cryo. He should be able to deal with a little cold weather. Instead, his mind decides to be an absolute child about the whole ordeal. Which is how he finds himself at your door in the middle of the night. 

He knows he shouldn't wake you, he's well aware of how annoying it is to have your sleep interrupted, but he couldn't bring himself to go back to his room. Three soft knocks on your door later, he comes face to face with you as the door swings open. 

With your hair a mess and sleep in your eyes you asked, "Bucky? Are you okay?"

As he stands there, he begins to feel more and more idiotic. "Yes. Well, no, not really. But it's okay. I shouldn't have bothered you."

"Are you crazy? Of course you should have." You pulled the door open wider, "Come in."

"I really shouldn't have bothered you. I'm sorry." Bucky made his way to your couch and sat down.

You sat down next to him and laid your head on his shoulder. “Bucky, stop, you’re not a bother.” 

“You need a better best friend. I’m too needy.”

Bucky wasn't expecting the whack you dealt to his shoulder, and dissolved into laughter afterwards. "Don't talk like that! We're stuck with each other."

"I know doll."

"You better. Now, why did you knock on my door in the middle of the night?"

"It's stupid."

"I'm waiting."

"It's just, it's gotten...stupid cold out, and I know it's dumb, but it freaks me out. Add that to the nightmares...it starts to feel like I'm gonna jump outta my skin. I guess I just wanted to not be alone for a while."

"Bucky you can come to me whenever you need to."

"I know. Thanks."

The pair of you sat in silence for a while, simply enjoying the other's company. Until you got up, started walking down the hall, and said, "Okay, come on. We're going to sleep."

"Huh?"

"You're staying here tonight."

"I am?"

"Yes. I'm tired, you're tired. And you deserve to sleep well, so no arguing."

Bucky held up his hands, "Okay, okay. I'm coming."

Laying in your bed wasn't new to Bucky. He had been there countless times, watching movies or napping. But he had never stayed with you the entire night. Something about it tapped into the simple domesticity he so wanted with you, and he didn't know if he could take it. 

When he had finally gotten comfortable enough to sleep he heard you say, “I can't believe you’re such a blanket hog!”

"C'mon, go to sleep and stop being so whiny.”

You rolled over to face him, "Excuse you. This is actually my bed. I'll whine all I want, thank you very much."

Bucky laughed and helped you readjust the covers, "Better?"

"Yes actually. Goodnight."

"Goodnight doll."

Bucky watched as your eyes closed and your breathing evened out. He did have to admit, no matter how nervous he was about it, laying there in the quiet with you was the most at ease he had felt in a long time. Shortly after, he fell asleep.

In the morning, Bucky forgot where he was at first. Until he felt the pleasantly unfamiliar weight across his chest and looked down to see your head laying there. Bucky didn't make a habit out of watching people sleep, he had always figured it wouldn't give people a very good impression of you. But he couldn't help but stare as you laid there. With you curled around him, all of sudden, Bucky could see the rest of his unfolding just like this. Spending the rest of his days with you and this sense of tranquility.

When your eyes started to open, Bucky tried very hard to look like he hadn't been actively watching you sleep.

With your face pressed against the pillow, you mumbled out, "Morning."

"G'morning doll."

You rolled to face him and said, "How'd you sleep?"

"Good. Really good. You?

"I'm glad. Yeah, I did too." 

You both got out of bed and went about starting your day. You ate breakfast in silence until you asked, "So what are you doing today?"

Bucky thought for a minute, "Nothing, actually."

"You wanna hang out?"

"Obviously."

You decided to spend the day binge watching tv shows. Bucky went to set up in your living room, and you started to make snacks. 

You pulled the bag of popcorn from the microwave, and went to pour it into a bowl. As you moved to throw the empty bag away, you knocked the bowl off the counter. As you watched the bowl of popcorn topple to the floor you sighed and said, "Why has god forsaken me?"

Bucky heard the commotion and came to see what was happening. He tried not to laugh, he really did, but in the end he couldn't help it. 

You glared at him, "This isn't funny Barnes."

He held up his hands, and went to get a broom to help you clean up. 

After making a whole new bowl of popcorn, you settled on the couch. You curled into Bucky's side, and he had his arm around your shoulder before he even knew what had happened. Cuddling on the couch wasn't odd for you two, but it got increasingly more difficult for Bucky the harder he fell for you. But he would choose spending the day with you over anything else.

Later on, when Bucky was back in his room, he thought about how much he wished he hadn't had to leave you. The contentment he felt when he was with you was something he hadn't felt around anyone else. He fell asleep wondering if he'd ever get more with you.

Bucky woke to thuds coming from his front door. Weird things happened to Bucky all the time, the price you pay when you wake up in a new world. But people didn't often knock on his door in the middle of the night. When he opened it, he found you on the other side, looking incredibly nervous. 

"Y/N?"

"Hi Bucky. Did I wake you? I know it's late."

Bucky shook his head, "No, no. I was awake. Do you wanna come in?"

You nodded and Bucky pulled the door open wider. You settled yourself on his couch and blurted out, "I'm in love with you."

Bucky had envisioned this moment a million times. It was usually him doing the confessing, but he wasn't complaining. He played out the scenario when he couldn't sleep, it was the stuff of his most pleasant daydreams. But he had never thought it would happen in real life. And now that it was, he knew he couldn't let it.

"Doll…"

"No, I know what you're gonna say. It's not going to ruin our friendship."

Bucky shook his head, "That's not what I was gonna say."

"Oh. What were you going to say?"

"You shouldn't...ya know you shouldn't have to be seen with someone…" Bucky trailed off, took a deep breath and started again. "You shouldn't have to be seen with someone like me. People have strong opinions about the Winter Soldier, and you shouldn't have to deal with them by association."

"Bucky you know none of that matters to me. I know who you are."

Bucky scoffed, "You can say that now. But it'll start to wear on you, and I couldn't lose you because of something like that."

You found his hand and laced your fingers together, “This is how it's supposed to be Bucky. Our hands were made to fit together. That’s all there is to it. You're not going to lose me. Especially not over the narrow mindedness of other people.”

In all the time he'd known you, you didn't say things you didn't mean. If you said you'd stick around, you were going to stick around. Bucky was kissing you before he realized what he was doing. He pulled away for a moment to say, "I love you too," and let himself sink into the feeling of your arms around his neck.

**Author's Note:**

> hi! thank you for reading! if you liked it, you can follow me on tumblr @blueberrythor


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